Fett and Co
by Jarik Fel
Summary: Story about Fett and friends at school disrupting, destroying, conquering


Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars but I do own the chocolate covered fire ants . I also own the secret lairunder my house. I also own my Super Secret Star Destroyer under the Great Pyramid.  
  
Jarik:I'm out of school, I'm out school!!  
  
Eddie:I'm out of school too.  
  
Jarik:But you don't go to school.  
  
Eddie:I go to your school, Jarik.*rancorily**big tooth smile*  
  
Eddie:I am the person always in the shadows and the person always but never there.   
  
Eddie:I am the.........  
  
Jarik:*finally realizes what Eddie is talking about* *screams in terror of his life passing before his nose* You're in the Mofia!!!!!????  
  
Eddie: No I-  
  
Jarik: Eddie's in the bloody Mofia!! The Mofia!!! Eddie!!!! *runs all around fanfiction spreading the news*  
  
Eddie: *calls after him* No I'm the gardener!!! THE GARDENER!!!  
  
Silver: *walks up* Soooo is it true you're in the Mofia?  
  
Eddie: *sigh* No.  
  
Silver: Ya..I didn't think I reconized you....  
  
Eddie: What are you saying Silver-  
  
Silver: Oh, look at the time!! we better start before the readers revolt.  
  
Eddie: But-  
  
Silver: Now here it is!!!  
  
*************************************************************************************************  
  
For Boba Fett it was any other day. He got to school right on schedule, hide Slave I under the baseball field, and captured and brainwashed anyone unlucky enough to see him land. Today was yet another chance for Fett and his friends to disrupt, to destroy, and to conquer. But what they didn't know was that they would do something so dastardly, so dangerous, that I can almost not speak the words of what they did that day.   
  
When Boba got to the door of the school he was met by his counterparts in crime. Two people that I can not name but will name anyway (Hey! I'm fired already for bringing up the subject in the first place. Might as well go all the way.). 1st, the King of Pumpkin Pie...- Jarik Fel! (clap, clap, clap) 2nd, the cocky, hot-blooded, scruffy-looking, half-witted, nerf herding, Corellian, the one and the only...Han Solo! (clap, clap, clap) (This was during Han and Boba's early years before the spice dumping incident with Jabba.)  
  
Han: Hey, Boba! What you got planned for today?  
  
Boba: Well, today, Han my man, I have the best prank since the lunch room stunt we pulled last month.  
  
Han: Tell me about it! That was one of the best I've seen in a looong time!  
  
Jarik: Yeh, especially the part where the plate of mystery meat catapulted across the room and hit Mr. Thomson right on the huge bald spot on his head! Man, I'd pay to see that again!  
  
Boba: Well, that might not be a bad idea, Jarik, charging kids to watch the tape of it, but we'll have to save that for later. What I have in this box will go down as the best prank in the history of the school!  
  
*opens box*  
  
Han: What is it?!  
  
*stare at rat looking creature in box*  
  
Boba: This, my friends, is a wamp rat I picked up yesterday on Tatooine after school.   
  
Jarik: So what are we going to do with it?  
  
Boba: Ok...this is what we do...  
  
*gather in corner whispering*  
  
*janitor drives by on the zamboni machine he stole from the skating rink, yelling, "you'll never catch me, you stinking fishes* * janitor is followed by a dozen or so evil tropical fishes which are some how managing to swim even though there not in water* *some students rapidly take notes about the fish, thinking maybe their teachers will give them extra points for discovering a new kind of fish*  
  
Han: Man, Boba! Great plan! When do we do it?  
  
Boba: There is only one time we CAN do this... during the-  
  
*whisper, whisper*  
  
*scary music*  
  
*people taking notes yell in terror*  
  
Han: Well, then, how will you decide if we do it or not Fett?  
  
Boba: Well, I figure if I fail my math test I'll do it, but...  
  
Jarik: But what Fett?  
  
Boba: ...But if I don't fail...I'll still do it. It's a win, win situation for me! And it's not like I care about my grades... Jarik can always hack into the school computer and change them.  
  
Jarik: *evil laugh* My pleasure, Boba, My pleasure...  
  
RIIIIIINNNNGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!  
  
*bell rings*  
  
*go to class*  
  
*four periods later*  
  
*during lunch*  
  
Jarik: Where's Boba? He's late for lunch.  
  
Han: Here he comes!  
  
*Fett runs into the lunchroom*  
  
*in frenzy to find something*  
  
Jarik: Hey, Fett! What's the matter?  
  
Boba: What's the matter? What's the matter!!!  
  
*Boba gets strange looks from people*  
  
*realizes he has been yelling*  
  
Boba: *in calm voice* Why, nothing at all is the matter.  
  
*After sitting down at the table*  
  
Han: Now, Fett, What's the matter?  
  
Boba: The stupid wamp rat got loose that's the matter!  
  
Jarik: No problem! I'll just turn on that tracking device I put on it...  
  
Boba: Oh, another problem, it took off the tracking device...   
  
Jarik: It WHAT!! How in the world does a nonintelligent being take off a tracking device?!  
  
Boba: No idea but here's your tracking device back.  
  
Jarik: *studies tracking device* I can't believe it! It bit right through! Oh, well, it's a good thing I always install two...  
  
Boba: Oh...here's the other one.  
  
Jarik: *sigh* Well that'll make it just a little harder to find...  
  
Han: Hey, guys look, in the ventilation shaft! A tail, and where there's a tail...  
  
Boba: There must be a wamp rat!  
  
*Han walks over and pulls the tail*  
  
*wamp rat falls on Han, bites him and jumps back into ventilation shaft*  
  
Han:*starts screaming bloody murder* AHHHHHHHHH!!!   
  
*Everyone in lunch room gives Han that look that makes you want to melt away into a puddle and lay there till the janitor comes mops you up* (YOU!!! YAH, YOU!!! YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS DON'T YA! THAT'S WHY I'M GOING TO STOP IT! I'M GOING TO PUT MY FOOT DOWN HERE, AND TAKE A STAND FOR ALL OF US WHO GOTTEN THAT LOOK OVER YEARS! I'M GOING TO STOP ALL THE INJUSTICES THAT HAPPEN TO US!I'M GOING TO............. oh, is that right I better get back to the story then. Sorry about that folks won't happen again.)  
  
Jarik: Han pull yourself together man! We can't have you melting away on us, now lets go.  
  
*Boba, Han, & Jarik enter the ventilation shaft*  
  
  
  
*follow wamp rat till reach teacher's lounge*  
  
*look through grate into teacher's lounge*  
  
Jarik: So this is the teacher's lounge, nice.  
  
*has several hot tubs, pools, massage tables, a casino (We point this out to inform you the real reason behind teacher's low salaries), and a Chinese restaurant*   
  
Boba: Okay, in order for us to get in there, we're going to need a distraction... Han go to the back of the school and shoot the teachers cars with your paintball gun, and Jarik you start the anti-homework rally in the front of school.   
  
*Jarik and Han set off through the shafts*   
  
*10 mins later*  
  
*an announcement is heard over the intercom calling all teachers to deal with the present situation*  
  
Boba: *quietly goes into lounge and grabs wamp rat*  
  
*suddenly the door swings open and the principal comes in with Han and Jarik in handcuffs*  
  
Principal: I've caught you Fett! Detention for you and your little pals! MWHAHAHAHAHA! *evil laugh*  
  
*10 mins later*  
  
*After being put in The Book of Student Martyrs for the General Cause for the millionth time they are put in detention*  
  
(Detention was actually created especially for poor Boba. It means Detainment en time enough news to ionize organisms needed to detain. *you get the point anyway*)  
  
Jarik: Hey, guys, I have a brilliant plan!  
  
Boba: What plan is that, Jarik?  
  
Jarik: We challenge the principal to a game of chess, since he likes it so much it will always work. Anyway if he doesn't win we get out of detention and get control of the school, but if he wins we have detention for the rest of the year. (It is currently November)   
  
Boba: One problem.... We can't play Chess!!  
  
Jarik: I know that! So we'll have Slave I play, it has enough intelligence to play Chess.   
  
*is stared at*  
  
Jarik: Look, we hook up a microphone to your ear and have Slave I tell you what to do.   
  
Boba: *sighs* Okay, I hope it works, summon the principal.  
  
*summon principal*  
  
*principal enters*  
  
Jarik: We challenge you to a game of chess. If you win we have detention for the rest of the year, but if you don't win we get control of the school and no charges are pressed against us.  
  
*thoughtful silence*  
  
Principal: Very well then, I accept. Let's get it over with.  
  
*sets up chess board that happened to be there*  
  
Principal: Black or White?  
  
Jarik: black of course!   
  
Boba: *sits down and starts to play*  
  
*4 hrs later*  
  
Fett: *left with queen and king*   
  
Principal: *bishop and king*   
  
*4 hrs later*  
  
*King vs. King*  
  
*They finally stalemate each other*  
  
Principal: Well I guess nothing changes! MWHAHAHAHA!!! *evil laugh*  
  
Jarik: Well actually since you didn't win we win the bet! *evil laugh*   
  
Principal: But you didn't win-  
  
Jarik: But we said if you didn't win and you didn't so we win !!!  
  
Principal: You scruffy looking children (very mad) (CHILD ABUSE!!!)!! Fine! Here's the keys to the school.  
  
Han: Fine with us! *sticks out tongue*  
  
Jarik: So, Fett, what are we going to do first?  
  
Boba: I'll tell you!  
  
*go in corner and talk*  
  
*pack of radio active hamsters run by*   
  
Han: Brilliant! See you tomorrow!   
  
*Tomorrow morning (Ya know.... there is no tomorrow because by the time we get there it's today... so this doesn't.... oh never mind*)*This statement has been done for the enjoyment of the audience, signed MB*   
  
*over intercom*  
  
Jarik: All students please report to the front lawn with your math books and homework. There will be a special presentation today.   
  
*all students go to front*   
  
*Han and Boba stand there holding several gallons of gasoline and a flame thrower*   
  
Han: All students please put your math books in that pile and step aside.  
  
*one pyromaniac by the name of Marian runs up and asks if she can start the fire*   
  
Boba: Sure. *shows her flame thrower* Push this to turn it on---  
  
Marian: *grabs it* *runs around shooting teachers with flame thrower*  
  
Boba: --- Oh, well... It's going to a good cause...  
  
*after setting books on fire*  
  
*sit down and admire work*  
  
Boba: We should do this more often.   
  
Han: Ya, like tomorrow.  
  
Jarik: Overall I'd say it's not to shabby.  
  
Boba: Well are we on for tomorrow.  
  
Han: I'm in.  
  
*all three get in Slave I and ride off into the sunset *  
  
*While Marian burns down school with the flame thrower*  
  
..............................................................................................................................................To Be Continued........?  
  
*************************************************************************************************  
  
This is Marian.... I am not here but else where...okay he's gone.....I didn't Write that.... so yes I should get part credit for this story becase I typed 90 percent of it!! Yes... reveiw it please and forgive Jarik's good grammer!  
  
Thanks!  
  
-MB  
  
Jarik:Thank you MB for your unsual comment, while I was in the kitchen raiding our fridge.  
  
Jarik:As reward fot the comment I'm go to give you lots of shiny matches for your birthday.  
  
Jarik:Thanks everyone for reading the story and Silver is not in the Mofia publily aand is only in it on the weekends.   
  
Mb:OOOooOOOOoooOo... Shiny matches.... 


End file.
